Live
by Dawnstorm101
Summary: RAGNAROK SPOILERS WITHIN. Odin appeared to Thor in his weakest moment, giving him the strength he needed to continue. Half a battle later, Loki is the one who needs him. And this time, Odin is finally ready to be the father his youngest child always needed.


A/N: I have so many Loki feels after Ragnarok. The scene where he reunites with Odin kills me every time thanks to Tom's brilliant acting - Loki's expressions break my heart. And then the movie never revisited Loki and Odin's relationship. While I absolutely love all of the Thor and Loki bonding this movie gave us, I feel like Loki and Odin needed some better closure than what they got. So that's what I tried to do here.

* * *

"With the Eternal Flame, you are reborn."

Loki watched as Surtur's skull began to shake, the flames rising to envelope it. He backed away slowly. Part of him was screaming to run, to get to the _Commodore_ and get very far away from this spot. But another part of him figured it was pointless. Even if he did somehow get away before Surtur burned him to a crisp, where would he go? Asgard was about to be destroyed, he'd annihilated every bridge he'd built on Sakaar, and would Thor even want him back, after everything he'd done?

Before he could make a conscious decision either way, a wall of heat exploded from the skull and flames. It blasted Loki back, sending him tumbling head over heels down the corridor. He crashed into the stairs, sharp pain stabbing him where he hit the edges. His head cracked against one, and stars burst across his vision.

He lay there, dazed and groaning, as Surtur began to grow.

"Loki."

That voice… it couldn't be. He was hallucinating.

"Open your eyes, my son. Please."

Slowly, wondering when his eyes had closed in the first place, Loki obeyed. And found that he was back in the field in Norway, the ocean roaring gently beneath him. A few feet away stood Odin, smiling sadly down at him.

"Father?" Loki rasped.

"Oh, my son," he said quietly, coming to kneel beside Loki.

"Am I… am I dead?" Loki asked, gingerly sitting up as he realized everything still hurt. This wasn't exactly how he'd pictured the afterlife – any version of it – but if Odin was here…

"No," Odin assured him. "I am simply visiting you when you need me."

"I don't-"

The protest was instinctive, but Loki's voice broke before he could finish it. Because it wasn't true. It had never been true, if he was being honest with himself, but he'd waited too long to admit it. Far too long.

"I'm sorry," was what he ended up saying, his voice tiny.

But Odin was shaking his head, and Loki tensed, waiting for the rejection. What had he been expecting? He had screwed up. Odin had every reason not to care about two little words from a boy on the verge of death.

"It is I who should be apologizing, Loki."

Loki just stared in shock. "Wh-what?"

Odin sat down heavily, resting a hand on Loki's shoulder. "I hid so much from you. I was not the father you needed."

"So it's true?" Loki asked hesitantly. "You do love me?"

"Of course, Loki," Odin promised. Loki searched his face for any hint of a lie, but there was only raw honesty. "I just… never expressed it correctly. I told myself that I did all I could for you, but I know it's not true."

Loki swallowed. "Is it because I remind you of Hela?"

Tears glimmered in Odin's eye. "Yes. It was already a risk, adopting a Frost Giant child, but as you grew and you started to look like her, dress like her, and learn magic… I was afraid. I was afraid that if I told you of your biological heritage, you would turn into the monster Hela had become, and I would have to banish a second child."

"Well, you were right," Loki muttered.

"I was correct because I pushed you away," Odin said. "If I had only told you when you were younger, if I had only been better at showing you affection… If, if, if. I only ever blamed myself for you actions, Loki, but I projected my anger onto you. And you acted accordingly."

Loki looked down. "I chose my own path."

"And why did you choose it?" Odin asked.

Loki's gaze flickered to his father and away again. "Because I thought you hated me."

"And that is my fault," Odin told him. "I loved Hela – I still do. She is my daughter and always will be, regardless of what she has done. What is inexcusable about that is I let that pain damage our own relationship. But, in that same vein, you are my son and I will always love you."

"Still," Loki murmured, "I'm sorry for banishing you."

Odin wrapped an arm around Loki. "I forgave you for that long ago, my son. My banishment gave me a clarity of thought that I had not had in quite some time. The funny thing about all the negative feelings between us and our actions because of them, is that, without them, we would not be here now."

Loki leaned into the contact, smiling wryly. "No, I suppose we wouldn't."

"Maybe it would have been better if-"

"I don't care," Loki interrupted, finally meeting his father's eye. "Our lives have too many what ifs, Father. Let's put this one to bed."

Father smiled proudly, gently pulling Loki's head down to kiss his forehead. "Your mother raised you well, son. Yes, let's put the past behind us."

"Mother," Loki breathed. "Is she…?"

Father nodded. "She is happy, and proud. Of both of you."

 _Thor._

Suddenly, Loki remembered the unbearable heat, his pain as he lay prone on the steps.

"I am afraid I must push you away one last time, Loki," Father said, pulling away from him.

Loki repressed the urge to reach for him like a scared little boy. "Can I even escape at this point?"

"Time is funny," Father replied vaguely. "We are aware of its passing, and yet it is a figment of imagination."

"So it's only been a moment in the real world," Loki concluded. "If I hurry, I can make it to the ship."

Father nodded. "Go. Be safe, my son. In this case, I would rather not see you for another few thousand years."

But still, Loki hesitated. "Will Thor even accept me?"

Father's expression softened. "I think you will find that love is the only truly important thing in life. Do you think Thor harnessed the full extent of his powers simply because I told him he was strong?"

Loki furrowed his brows. "Yes?"

Father shook his head. "He saw you, Loki. When he was at his weakest, he saw you returning to his side. Just as you will always be my son, you will always be his brother. For you, he will always fight. Just as you came to fight for him."

Loki glanced out, seeing the vision begin to gradually fade away. The green grass began melting into tile, the sky into darkness, and his father into nothingness. He looked up at his father, suddenly realizing there were so many things he wanted to say, but there wasn't enough time, he was disappearing too fast-

"I know, my son," Father assured him. "I love you, too. All I ask is one thing: Live."

Loki nodded, letting a couple welling tears slip out. "I'll do my best, Father."

He smiled one last time, and then he was gone.

Loki gasped as the heat and pain slammed back into full force, and for a moment, he couldn't move. _Live,_ he told himself. _Live._

Gritting his teeth, he dragged himself up the stairs, forced himself to his feet, staggered to the _Commodore_ , and took off to join the other Asgardians.

He flew home.

* * *

A/N: Couldn't resist the dash of bromance feels. I never can.


End file.
